Top 7 Things To Do When You Are A Washington Generals Fan

On the flip side of my earlier post on what not to do if you are a Washington Generals fan... here are 7 things you need to do if you are a Washington Generals fan.

Copyright © by Dinur Blum.
Used Under Creative Commons.

1.) Tell People You Are A Fan - While most people have heard of the Harlem Globetrotters, at least by reputation, you would be surprised how many have not heard of the Washington Generals. Spread the word!

2.) Wear a Washington Generals T-Shirt or Jersey - They even sell them at the games now. You have no excuse.

3.) Refuse to come down to the court if Big Easy or Special K invite you down - Little G will EAT YOU!

4.) Be a graceful loser - Past records would indicate you just might have to exercise it. If you think being a Generals fan is about watching your team win the big one... boy are you in for a shock. Being a Generals fan is about being entertained and appreciating the talent the Generals show. Do that and no matter what the final score says you and the Generals will both leave the arena winners.

5.) Bring a kid - If you don't have kids take a relatives kid. Odds are they will cheer for the Globetrotters yes, but there is nothing like seeing the Washington Generals take on the Harlem Globetrotters through the eyes of a child.

6.) Be respectful - Clap and cheer for the Generals of course, but do it with class. DO NOT start booing the Globetrotters and heckling them with your "clever" remarks. Odds are you are not as funny as you think you are, and even if you are (which you very likely aren't.) the audience came to be entertained by the Generals and Trotters, not by your attempts at clever insults. Show the people around you that Generals fans have class. And for the love of you know who... don't cuss. Part of the magic of a Generals game is that it is a rare night of G rated fun, don't be the idiot who ruins it.

7.) Always remember the most important lesson to be learned from the Washington Generals - It's not whether you win or loose, it's how you play the game. (I know this was on the other list, but it can't be said enough.)

Top 7 Things Not To Do When You Are A Washington Generals Fan

In the interest of helping us all become better fans, I am giving you a list of the top 5 things not to do when you are a Washington Generals fan.

1. Don't bet your life savings on the Washington Generals - Take a hint from Krusty. Oh he had the right idea don't get me wrong. But he got too greedy. Betting 1-5 dollars will more than set you for life once the Washington Generals get their next win. And it will happen.

Copyright © by Dinur Blum. Used under Creative Commons.

2. Don't try hypnotizing anyone with an umbrella - Reggie Bennet might pull it off, but I tried... it didn't work... things got awkward.

3. Don't compare the current losing NBA team to the Washington Generals - 99 times out of 100 comparing the Generals to the team currently stinking up the NBA is REALLY unfair to the Washington Generals. It's also been done to death. For crying out loud, show some originality!

4. Don't yell out insults to the Globetrotters - It is common instinct to want to jeer your favorite teams arch rivals. But you will break the hearts of the small children around you. And one thing the Generals and Globetrotters share is their passion for entertaining children. So keep your support to enthusiastic clapping. Unless you are there in the stands when the Generals finally win their next game. If that happens you have permission of every Washington General fan across the world to tell the Globetrotter fans to "EAT IT!"

5. Don't try to start a "Go Generals" cheer - Unless you came with 50 or more fellow Washington Generals fans I am sorry to say that it won't work.

6. Don't duck when they throw the bucket of "water" at your section of the stands - It is just confetti people! How many times are we going to fall for that one? We are Generals fans, we need to be more wise to the Globetrotters cunning trickery then their own fans are.

7. Don't ever forget the most important thing to be learned when watching our favorite team play - "It's not whether you win or lose. It's how you play the game!"