Thursday, May 19, 2011

Top 7 Things Not To Do When You Are A Washington Generals Fan

In the interest of helping us all become better fans, I am giving you a list of the top 5 things not to do when you are a Washington Generals fan.

1. Don't bet your life savings on the Washington Generals - Take a hint from Krusty. Oh he had the right idea don't get me wrong. But he got too greedy. Betting 1-5 dollars will more than set you for life once the Washington Generals get their next win. And it will happen.

Copyright © by Dinur Blum. Used under Creative Commons.
2. Don't try hypnotizing anyone with an umbrella - Reggie Bennet might pull it off, but I tried... it didn't work... things got awkward.

3. Don't compare the current losing NBA team to the Washington Generals - 99 times out of 100 comparing the Generals to the team currently stinking up the NBA is REALLY unfair to the Washington Generals. It's also been done to death. For crying out loud, show some originality!

4. Don't yell out insults to the Globetrotters - It is common instinct to want to jeer your favorite teams arch rivals. But you will break the hearts of the small children around you. And one thing the Generals and Globetrotters share is their passion for entertaining children. So keep your support to enthusiastic clapping. Unless you are there in the stands when the Generals finally win their next game. If that happens you have permission of every Washington General fan across the world to tell the Globetrotter fans to "EAT IT!"

5. Don't try to start a "Go Generals" cheer - Unless you came with 50 or more fellow Washington Generals fans I am sorry to say that it won't work.

6. Don't duck when they throw the bucket of "water" at your section of the stands - It is just confetti people! How many times are we going to fall for that one? We are Generals fans, we need to be more wise to the Globetrotters cunning trickery then their own fans are.

7. Don't ever forget the most important thing to be learned when watching our favorite team play - "It's not whether you win or lose. It's how you play the game!"

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